5 Sports Movies for People Who Don’t Care About Sports
by Julia York
Okay, I admit it: the extent to which I care about sports occurs in direct relation to how much I can sit down during said sporting event and if there are a variety of snacks present. Even if these circumstances are satisfactory, I will eventually be incredibly bored. It is just my nature. And while I may not have any vested interest in real sports, I can muster a certain level of enthusiasm for fictional sports—that is, sports movies.
If you’re anything like me—sports-resistant but cinema obsessed—you may gravitate towards sports comedies rather than, say, Remember the Titans and its ilk (I actually happen to love Remember the Titans). However, even sports comedies are not created equal, so I’ve narrowed down five “sports-adjacent” films that will scratch your itch for rousing competition but not leave you wondering what the hell an “audible” is.
The Sandlot
Sure, The Sandlot is about baseball, but it’s really about a janky giant dog puppet the magic of childhood friendship. For the young boys who spend their summer in the sandlot, baseball is life. For us viewers, the game is cool (as is the infamous smack talk it elicits), but what’s even better are the themes of loyalty, growing up, and childhood adventure that define this film—many of which occur outside of actual game play (care for a vomit-inducing carnival ride along with your tobacco, anyone?).
In fact, the film’s third act features virtually no baseball sequences as the story becomes an epic journey to retrieve a ball signed by the Great Bambino himself from the jaws of a neighborhood dog. The heroes of The Sandlot are not professional athletes but rather awkward kids who experience the nerves of first kisses and fitting in, and that makes us root for them all the more.
Cool Runnings
Yes, Cool Runnings culminates in an emotional Olympic showdown. However, there’s enough humor and heart in this film that eventually the eponymous bobsled competition becomes an (icy) undercurrent, and the most enjoyable moments derive from the relationships and antics of the four Jamaican athletes (and the always loveable John Candy). Cool Runnings lacks a certain epicness inherent to the sports film genre, but that’s totally fine; as the viewer, the investment in the actual outcome only has to be minimal as the rest of the film provides more than enough entertainment value. Of course you hope the boys overcome the odds and win (spoiler: they don’t!), but what you mostly want to see is Sanka (Doug E. Doug) screaming his ever-lovin’ head off the first time he shoots down the frozen bobsled course.
Space Jam
Space Jam is an oddity, and I mean that literally: it is odd. About as subtle as a spaceship crash landing in a busy parking lot, this film represents the epitome of the strange ‘90s-era animation zeitgeist, rounded out by the larger-than-life presence of Michael Jordan (who is actually pretty funny here). Space Jam may be about a basketball game in which a group of space aliens attempt to “win” the Tune Squad and Jordan in order to imprison them in a perpetual, intergalactic sideshow (normal), but the film actually serves as a showcase of wacky Warner Bros. nostalgia in which basketball is the mere vehicle for unhinged cartoon antics. Sports movie? Sure. Fever dream? Definitely.
Dodgeball
The only reason to care about the actual game of dodgeball in Dodgeball is that watching people get hit in the face with giant rubber balls will never not be funny, especially when said person is Justin Long at his scrawny, teenaged best. If dramatic sports films tend to lean towards the earnest, Dodgeball seeks to overcorrect that narrative by diving head-first into pure spectacular farce. Ben Stiller wears violet latex and shoves pizza down his pants, Christine Taylor plays a lawyer with a unicorn obsession, and Rip Torn admits he drinks his own urine “because he likes the taste.” There’s a pirate in this movie, for crying out loud, and his wayfaring identity serves almost no definable plot purpose. Come for the competition, stay for Stiller (as White Goodman) declaring, “Nobody makes me bleed my own blood.”
A League of Their Own
I grew up watching a VHS of A League of Their Own which my aunt handed down to me, and let me tell you, the least interesting part of viewing this movie was the baseball. Of course, I was around 10 years old and thus held a limited capacity to appreciate the minutiae of baseball things (the scientific term, I believe). However, the film itself is barely interested in the more technical aspects of the game, rather opting for mostly montages of game play until the climactic World Series sequence (which even then mostly highlights the emotional drama between sisters Kit and Dottie).
For me, I am long enchanted (and entertained) by the sisterly camaraderie of A League of Their Own, a theme which plays out against the backdrop of WWII-era baseball in the form of tour bus bonding, liquored up dancing, and relentless delightful banter between Doris (Rosie O’Donnell) and May (Madonna), among other things. That, and Tom Hanks in one of his best roles as the insult-savvy coach Jimmy Dugan.
No matter your particular “sporty” flavor, sports films don’t have to be out of your league. From acquiring newfound respect for Ben Stiller’s immaculate—if unnerving—mustache, reminiscing about your own summers spent as a child, or letting your brain melt for a bit after seeing Tweety Bird in an iron lung, sports films truly can be for everyone.
Julia York is a freelance writer and creative with a M.A. in Cinema Studies. You can find her on Instagram and at juliajyork.com.